Paying for Bad Attitudes

“We won’t pay for a bad attitude.” I was interviewing Dan Reiland, executive pastor of 12Stone Church, for my book, In Pursuit of Great AND Godly Leadership. When I asked how they addressed performance problems, Dan explained that 12Stone gives individuals the tools and time needed to address shortfalls. But when the problem is a bad attitude, they are much less tolerant. As you read this, you may be thinking of a specific staff member who brings a cloud of negativity into every interaction. So why do so many churches and ministries put up with bad attitudes among staff members? More importantly, what’s the solution?

• Be more precise.Labeling an attitude as “bad” is inherently subjective. If a staff member misses deadlines, that undesired behavior can be objectively measured. When it comes to attitude, it’s not as easy. So identify specific concerns – demeaning other colleagues, criticizing decisions, not helping when asked, snapping in anger – rather than using the generic “attitude” label.
• Pay attention to patterns. Everyone has bad days that can affect their attitudes. That is why it’s important to distinguish between a single incident and an ongoing trend. Step back and ask yourself, “How often am I (or others) frustrated with this person’s attitude?” The answer should tell you whether you’re facing a real problem.
• Don’t make excuses. Because attitude problems are more difficult to address, we often make excuses for the offender. We might say, “They’re under a lot of pressure right now,” or “I know they can be grouchy, but look at the growth of their ministry.” Be honest. If you’re making excuses rather than addressing the problem, you’re saying that you will pay for bad attitudes.
• Count the cost. We’re more willing to make excuses and overlook bad attitudes because the cost of this undesired behavior can be subtle. And yet, addressing attitude problems has many benefits. Staff meetings are more positive. Overall morale improves. Turnover of good employees goes down. Teammates discover better ways to do ministry as they work together.

Ultimately, the appropriate response is having the difficult conversations. You need to hold the mirror up to the offender. Some attitude problems are so deeply ingrained that the person is unaware. In these cases, you may be the catalyst for a change in behavior. And even if that’s not the outcome, it is the right first step so that you don’t continue paying for a bad attitude. It’s easy to receive my blogs by email. Just sign-up on Feedburner by clicking here.]]>