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Ask More Questions

This is one of a series of blogs on FOA – frequently offered advice – based on common themes from my coaching work over the last 20 years. 

Many ministry leaders enter their roles with a skewed understanding of leadership. Their model is based on telling and directing. This is especially true for pastors, who need to have excellent speaking skills for their weekly sermons, and rely on those same skills in other parts of leadership.

But listening is an equally important leadership tool. And asking more questions opens the door for listening and learning, and therefore for leading more effectively. 

Leaders that ask sincere questions signal that they don’t know the answer. The conversation that flows from a thoughtful question gives a leader a fresh perspective to consider. The questions invite others into an important conversation about future priorities and decisions. Once they’ve been invited to collaborate in this way, people have higher buy-in and commitment to the ultimate decision. 

The good news is that the questions that start these conversations are quite simple. They are questions such as:

  • How do you see this situation?
  • Help me understand what you believe and why?
  • What would you do about this decision? Or what would you do differently?

Simple, but not easy. A commitment to ask questions is a decision to take the time to include others in the decision-making process. It requires the discipline to not jump straight to the answer, even when it seems obvious. It means being more vulnerable by admitting that you don’t know the answer, or even that you’re wrong. It’s not easy, but it is a more effective way to lead. Do you agree?

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