I recently had an important videoconference with the board of directors of a ministry that I’ve been working with. I connected early, and the technology seemed to be working. But when the board members began talking, they all sounded like Charlie Brown’s teacher. I heard voices, but they might as well have been saying “wah, wah, wah.” A few minutes later, several remote microphones were placed on the table, and the words instantly become clear. It turns out that all of the sound had been going through a single microphone on a computer that was 20 feet away. 

As a leader, you know it’s important to listen to others. But are you creating the right conditions so that you can hear their input? You may respond, “I’m open to input. I make myself available.” But is your availability like the single computer microphone that I encountered at the start of my call? It would have been ridiculous to ask each board member to walk up to the computer and lean into the microphone whenever they wanted to talk. Have you unintentionally created a similar dynamic?

Here are 3 questions to help you improve the quality of your listening:

• Are you inviting the right people to speak? The best input comes from a diversity of perspectives. If you’re surrounded by people who think just like you, or who always want to please you, then you probably need to set out a few more “microphones.” 
• Is your invitation genuine? Many people are reluctant to offer constructive criticism, either out of respect for the leader or fear of an adverse reaction. When asking for input, stress that you want complete and honest feedback. And then don’t get defensive when someone takes you at your word and offers a candid response. 
• Are you allowing enough time? People who feel rushed are less likely to speak. They may need time to process their thoughts. They may be waiting for someone else to go first. Or they may infer that a quick feedback step is just a facade for a decision that has already been made. 

In my videoconference, I quickly knew that there was a problem. In your case, the issues are likely to be more subtle. So use these questions to assess whether you need to pause long enough to add remote microphones. 

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One of Adam Grant’s “WorkLife” podcasts has the intriguing title, “How to Love Criticism.” It begs the question, “Can we really love criticism?” During one segment, Grant describes being a competitive diver in high school. He had learned a new dive, and was confident that he had nailed it in a competition, only to get scores of 2 or less from the judges. Grant commented, “It’s hard to have a realistic assessment of how you’re doing when you‘re twisting and flipping in the air.” 

That statement sounds like the reality for most church and ministry leaders. The very nature of ministry today puts leaders in places where they are twisting and flipping. The things that they learned in their formal training or that have worked in the past are no longer effective. New pressures and attacks come from many directions, both internal and external. 

So let me offer three observations about leaders who are twisting and flipping. First, accept the truth in the quote. It’s difficult to be a good judge of your effectiveness when you’re in the middle of a difficult leadership moment. So find people that you trust who will give honest, loving, helpful feedback, preferably before you do a belly flop.

Second, it would have been a mistake for Grant to quit doing this dive just because he “failed” once. The low scores from the judges were a learning opportunity. The same is true for you. When things don’t go well, don’t give up. Use your failures as opportunities to learn.

Finally, Grant’s observation about assessing one’s own dive is only partly true. Olympic level divers have a good idea when they’ve nailed the dive, and when they’ve missed. But this kind of awareness only comes with hours of practice. So be willing to do the hard work of leadership so that you can nail it often and know when you’ve made a mistake. 

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